Response to Teandra - Week 4

I feel like it depends on the situation. I have three children, with three different "back to work" scenarios - none were the best, nor the worse. My first child was born when I was married for less than two years and it was always decided (not entirely my decision) that I would go back to work (not my prior full-time job because we couldn't afford child care, essentially my job would cancel that out). So when my daughter was six weeks' old, I got a job from 4 - 8 p.m., four days a week, after a full day of being with her, my mother would come and be with my daughter (most of which I arranged during her nap time). I was exhausted from the day, I had to make sure that when my husband came home at six, he had dinner, and everything was virtually set up for my daughter, if she was awake. After six months, I got a job during the day from 9a.m. to 1 p.m., and I brought my daughter to my mother-in-law's. These were okay situations, not the best; but my child was not being watched by a "stranger" and I was able to financially contribute to the family.

My first two children are 2 years 5 months apart. The scenario with my second child was better. After a year, similar to one of the situations you mentioned. I wanted some adult contact with two young children at home. So, I got a job on Sundays from 9 - 1, and my husband watched the girls. Did I think he did "the job" as well as I did - probably not, but he was their father and he was there and I was at work, that's it, whatever decisions he made with the children when he was in charge was his decision. My third child was born after 5 years after my second, and I have posted my child care "dilemma" regarding the child care decision I made with him. Is there a the perfect scenario, I don't think so. Sometimes, "ya gotta do, what you gotta do", and other times, it's your choice and that's okay, too. My thoughts are if it works for you - then that's the best. As far as, that father taking care of his baby, you got two choices, work or take care of the baby - when you give up the option to be at home, you must defer to the person you leave in charge - that's my opinion.